Wednesday, August 30
> 1 down, 3 to go!
What happens when you see the same person everyday without fail for about 10 hours a day, 7 days in a row? Hmm... what a question to ponder.
Its almost 12.30am and its exactly 9 hours to the start of my SAPM paper. But yet im not even half way through the revision. Seems like another sleepless night for me. I so wanna give up and just crap my way through, but my conscience tells me no, because i got a freaking C+ for coursework. First time in my entire life. And i so have to work triple hard to at least score a B, which pretty much suck as well cos i like nothing else except As and Zs.
Its pretty distracting now because im so not used to study alone at home. There's nothing i can do when im bored except to go out for a smoke break. Bah, i dont know what im saying already.
Back to my notes.
What happens when you see the same person everyday without fail for about 10 hours a day, 7 days in a row? Hmm... what a question to ponder.
Its almost 12.30am and its exactly 9 hours to the start of my SAPM paper. But yet im not even half way through the revision. Seems like another sleepless night for me. I so wanna give up and just crap my way through, but my conscience tells me no, because i got a freaking C+ for coursework. First time in my entire life. And i so have to work triple hard to at least score a B, which pretty much suck as well cos i like nothing else except As and Zs.
Its pretty distracting now because im so not used to study alone at home. There's nothing i can do when im bored except to go out for a smoke break. Bah, i dont know what im saying already.
Back to my notes.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 12:32:00 am
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Sunday, August 27
> i just need one wish
If i'm given just one wish, i would wish for a bowl of meng po soup. So that i could forget about all the past and start life afresh.
What about you?
------------------------------------------------------
In life, things would not always go the way you want things to be, because that wouldnt be called "life".
Life's like a rollarcoaster ride, that's why people have downs and ups. Ive gone through abundant troughs and peaks and ive realised that not many things actually go the way i want it to be.
So from this moment on, i'll stop pursuing for the perfect person, i'll just let it come. Once i got hold of the feeling, i'll not let it go, unless its not meant to be mine.
Wouldn't life be much better then? I guess so.
------------------------------------------------------
So give me that one wish, to let me start my life anew.
If i'm given just one wish, i would wish for a bowl of meng po soup. So that i could forget about all the past and start life afresh.
What about you?
------------------------------------------------------
In life, things would not always go the way you want things to be, because that wouldnt be called "life".
Life's like a rollarcoaster ride, that's why people have downs and ups. Ive gone through abundant troughs and peaks and ive realised that not many things actually go the way i want it to be.
So from this moment on, i'll stop pursuing for the perfect person, i'll just let it come. Once i got hold of the feeling, i'll not let it go, unless its not meant to be mine.
Wouldn't life be much better then? I guess so.
------------------------------------------------------
So give me that one wish, to let me start my life anew.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 5:27:00 am
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Thursday, August 24
> study.study.study
You know, i used to study like about 12 hours a day non stop (except for toilet and meal breaks) during the study week. Now, i only study a few hours at night, with the company of Sunny, Zero and Ah Mong.
And there are so many things thats on my mind, making me really depressed, screwing up my thoughts and im so gonna break down in no time. Trust me on that.
For the past few nights, ive been returning home, the earliest at 4.30am. After mugging at Kallang Macs, we would be having supper somewhere else, or playing pool/billiard at East Coast (and i suck terribly at that).
Ive never been so relaxed during the study week.
Not that im complaining, but now its already Thursday and i realised, im so gonna be in deep shit.
HELP!!
You know, i used to study like about 12 hours a day non stop (except for toilet and meal breaks) during the study week. Now, i only study a few hours at night, with the company of Sunny, Zero and Ah Mong.
And there are so many things thats on my mind, making me really depressed, screwing up my thoughts and im so gonna break down in no time. Trust me on that.
For the past few nights, ive been returning home, the earliest at 4.30am. After mugging at Kallang Macs, we would be having supper somewhere else, or playing pool/billiard at East Coast (and i suck terribly at that).
Ive never been so relaxed during the study week.
Not that im complaining, but now its already Thursday and i realised, im so gonna be in deep shit.
HELP!!
sealed-with-a-kiss < 4:01:00 pm
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Monday, August 21
> one more regret into my alreadyfullofregrets life
I just had the greatest shock of my life.
You know, i always try to think twice or even thrice before making an important decision because i dont wanna live in regrets.
It was a tough choice, but still, i made the decision to let go.
And ive never regretted it, until now.
If everything was going on fine, it would have been a year.
But now its all back to zero, because of me.
Call me jealous, cos i am.
Why didnt i get the same treatment back then.
Why didnt he change earlier, or maybe he was still the same.
Just that there wasnt enough love for him to treat me that same way.
Im always afraid that one day i would regret my decision.
And today, is the day.
Why did it take me so long to realise that the feelings lingered all along inside me.
Why didnt i give him another chance earlier on.
Why am i such a perfectionist, wishing that everything around me has gotta be perfect.
When i know im not perfect, not even close to that.
I always knew you're the one and only closetoperfect guy that will ever appear in my life.
But yet i still chose to give up because im so greedy.
Now why am i whining and who should i blame.
I always try to keep this regret away from me.
But now im feeling it, what more can i say.
Goodbye.
Once yours,
Amber.
I just had the greatest shock of my life.
You know, i always try to think twice or even thrice before making an important decision because i dont wanna live in regrets.
It was a tough choice, but still, i made the decision to let go.
And ive never regretted it, until now.
If everything was going on fine, it would have been a year.
But now its all back to zero, because of me.
Call me jealous, cos i am.
Why didnt i get the same treatment back then.
Why didnt he change earlier, or maybe he was still the same.
Just that there wasnt enough love for him to treat me that same way.
Im always afraid that one day i would regret my decision.
And today, is the day.
Why did it take me so long to realise that the feelings lingered all along inside me.
Why didnt i give him another chance earlier on.
Why am i such a perfectionist, wishing that everything around me has gotta be perfect.
When i know im not perfect, not even close to that.
I always knew you're the one and only closetoperfect guy that will ever appear in my life.
But yet i still chose to give up because im so greedy.
Now why am i whining and who should i blame.
I always try to keep this regret away from me.
But now im feeling it, what more can i say.
Goodbye.
Once yours,
Amber.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 1:59:00 am
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Sunday, August 20
> Things a girl shouldnt do.
There are two things a girl should never do.
Firstly, never get too drunk and wasted to the extent whereby people could just take advantage of you and there's no way you can escape from that.
Secondly, never fall asleep at a chalet no matter how tired you are, because people might take advantage of you too.
p.s. the above were just for fun. heh.
There are two things a girl should never do.
Firstly, never get too drunk and wasted to the extent whereby people could just take advantage of you and there's no way you can escape from that.
Secondly, never fall asleep at a chalet no matter how tired you are, because people might take advantage of you too.
p.s. the above were just for fun. heh.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 3:26:00 pm
___________________________________________
Thursday, August 17
> Happy birthday mom!
Yeap. Mommy's 48th birthday celebration this evening at Raffles Town Club with da family. Had a great feast worth more than $300 at the Japanese restaurant. Despite me down with fever, flu and a bad throat, i couldnt care less and ate everything on the table. It was damn yummy i swear.
I just realised my dad is a man with 5Cs. Okay, maybe more than that because he's so damn caring to the extent whereby he is OVER concerned with every one of us, which sometimes makes me so mad. Okay, this is damn random.
I caught Click with Kelvin on National Day eve and i got stucked in a traffic jam so badly which took me an hour later to get to Suntec when it usually takes me only 10 minutes. And i left my place a quarter to nine to catch the movie at five minutes past ten but i was still late for the movie and had to miss the first part. The movie got me so cranked up i couldnt stop laughing but Kelvin didnt really make a single noise because he had already caught it. So it made me felt like im an idiot. But who cares.
Then i met my beloved sweethearts on National Day at Cosy bay for the annual fireworks display. Its a 10 year pact i made with my girlies and currently its the 4th. Yes, im still standing strong at my decision that it's the 4th although everyone else forgot because this way, we'll never know when its the 10th, so we will always meet up year after year.
And the pictures will only be ready, after the laziest friend i have on earth decides to upload em. And that's none other Ms Tan Jinli. Damn slow lah!!
I was all hyped out, feeling happy and all but suddenly i realised i couldnt go on. I cant let myself suppress all those feelings anymore i need to let em out. And here comes Jeffrey, my most irritating friend.
Yeap. Mommy's 48th birthday celebration this evening at Raffles Town Club with da family. Had a great feast worth more than $300 at the Japanese restaurant. Despite me down with fever, flu and a bad throat, i couldnt care less and ate everything on the table. It was damn yummy i swear.
I just realised my dad is a man with 5Cs. Okay, maybe more than that because he's so damn caring to the extent whereby he is OVER concerned with every one of us, which sometimes makes me so mad. Okay, this is damn random.
I caught Click with Kelvin on National Day eve and i got stucked in a traffic jam so badly which took me an hour later to get to Suntec when it usually takes me only 10 minutes. And i left my place a quarter to nine to catch the movie at five minutes past ten but i was still late for the movie and had to miss the first part. The movie got me so cranked up i couldnt stop laughing but Kelvin didnt really make a single noise because he had already caught it. So it made me felt like im an idiot. But who cares.
Then i met my beloved sweethearts on National Day at Cosy bay for the annual fireworks display. Its a 10 year pact i made with my girlies and currently its the 4th. Yes, im still standing strong at my decision that it's the 4th although everyone else forgot because this way, we'll never know when its the 10th, so we will always meet up year after year.
And the pictures will only be ready, after the laziest friend i have on earth decides to upload em. And that's none other Ms Tan Jinli. Damn slow lah!!
I was all hyped out, feeling happy and all but suddenly i realised i couldnt go on. I cant let myself suppress all those feelings anymore i need to let em out. And here comes Jeffrey, my most irritating friend.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 1:01:00 am
___________________________________________
Tuesday, August 15
> look who's pathetic.
So do you really think you're what? Sugar, spice and everything nice?
Oh whatever. I think you're just pathetic.
Yes, and im referring to you. The person whose name starts with the letter A. And that's A****.
So you got that right.
Sometimes i wonder why i always talk to myself. siao.
Just in case some of you are wondering, i was just referring to myself. You know, sometimes i really hate the way i am.
So do you really think you're what? Sugar, spice and everything nice?
Oh whatever. I think you're just pathetic.
Yes, and im referring to you. The person whose name starts with the letter A. And that's A****.
So you got that right.
Sometimes i wonder why i always talk to myself. siao.
Just in case some of you are wondering, i was just referring to myself. You know, sometimes i really hate the way i am.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 11:53:00 pm
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Thursday, August 10
> The analogy of love and playing mahjong.
After so many consecutive days of mahjong games, i realised one thing.
"Love is like playing mahjong."
Sounds absurd i know.
Situation 1
Once you miss a tile to pong or chi, there is a lower possibility of pong-ing or chi-ing that tile again. Just like once you miss a chance to be with somebody, you may miss it forever. And there's no room for regrets.
Situation 2
According to situation 1, maybe say after you miss that chance, there is another 3 more chances, depending on your luck. So if there is mutual love between you and the other, there may be another chance to be together. heh.
Situation 3
Imagine that on hand you have already 4 tai and the tile to game is either a hong zhong or a yi tong. Someone threw a yi tong out but you didnt wanna end the game because you believe that someone else would throw a hong zhong sooner or later, and that's another tai. So you didnt end the game and continued waiting. Only to realise that someone else beat you to the game and ended it with 6 tai. And so its like, you kept waiting for the perfect person of your dreams, giving up one after another because you feel that the best has yet to come. And ultimately, you end up with nothing at all.
Situation 4
So now you're doing a ping hu and you're already waiting for the winning tile. But the next tile you draw so happen to be a smelly flower and you demoted from a 4 tai to a 1 tai. In relation, its like your relationship with the other half has always been smooth sailing but out came a third party that screwed the whole relationship up. But be glad that you still have 1 tai to game with, beats better than someone else winning the game.
Situation 5
Your tiles on hand are atrocious and you never seem to draw a tile that would do any better. And that's like meeting the wrong person all the time and never once met someone who you deserve.
Situation 6
You have 9 tiles opened on floor, of which all is wan zi. Your opponents didnt want to let you end the game, so they rather change their tiles to keep all the wan zi rather than discarding them. I call them the jealous people, who will do all things to refrain you from being with the person you love. How very vicious.
Or maybe im just too crazy after all the mahjong games.
After so many consecutive days of mahjong games, i realised one thing.
"Love is like playing mahjong."
Sounds absurd i know.
Situation 1
Once you miss a tile to pong or chi, there is a lower possibility of pong-ing or chi-ing that tile again. Just like once you miss a chance to be with somebody, you may miss it forever. And there's no room for regrets.
Situation 2
According to situation 1, maybe say after you miss that chance, there is another 3 more chances, depending on your luck. So if there is mutual love between you and the other, there may be another chance to be together. heh.
Situation 3
Imagine that on hand you have already 4 tai and the tile to game is either a hong zhong or a yi tong. Someone threw a yi tong out but you didnt wanna end the game because you believe that someone else would throw a hong zhong sooner or later, and that's another tai. So you didnt end the game and continued waiting. Only to realise that someone else beat you to the game and ended it with 6 tai. And so its like, you kept waiting for the perfect person of your dreams, giving up one after another because you feel that the best has yet to come. And ultimately, you end up with nothing at all.
Situation 4
So now you're doing a ping hu and you're already waiting for the winning tile. But the next tile you draw so happen to be a smelly flower and you demoted from a 4 tai to a 1 tai. In relation, its like your relationship with the other half has always been smooth sailing but out came a third party that screwed the whole relationship up. But be glad that you still have 1 tai to game with, beats better than someone else winning the game.
Situation 5
Your tiles on hand are atrocious and you never seem to draw a tile that would do any better. And that's like meeting the wrong person all the time and never once met someone who you deserve.
Situation 6
You have 9 tiles opened on floor, of which all is wan zi. Your opponents didnt want to let you end the game, so they rather change their tiles to keep all the wan zi rather than discarding them. I call them the jealous people, who will do all things to refrain you from being with the person you love. How very vicious.
Or maybe im just too crazy after all the mahjong games.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 4:02:00 pm
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Sunday, August 6
> ktv!
Yesterday, the 3 crazy people (lyn, kenny and i) glued our butts on the seats of Partyworld @ Loyang from 8pm to 2am and that's 6 hours of non stop singing. Trust me when i say my voice is hoarse now. I couldnt even reach the high notes of the other songs after a couple of crazy shoutings with Lyn.
Our turn to camwhore when Kenny sings solo.
I cant smile without showing my tiny teeth for goodness sake!
Kenny being retarded!
And that's 6 years of brosis-ship.
And you, my dear reader(s) are in for a real treat.
Presenting to you, Jie Mei (originally sang by A-mei) by Lyn and I (with parts of Kenny)
There are actually like lots more lah. But i better not embarrass myself with my siaoness and horrible singing.
Yesterday, the 3 crazy people (lyn, kenny and i) glued our butts on the seats of Partyworld @ Loyang from 8pm to 2am and that's 6 hours of non stop singing. Trust me when i say my voice is hoarse now. I couldnt even reach the high notes of the other songs after a couple of crazy shoutings with Lyn.
Our turn to camwhore when Kenny sings solo.
I cant smile without showing my tiny teeth for goodness sake!
Kenny being retarded!
And that's 6 years of brosis-ship.
And you, my dear reader(s) are in for a real treat.
Presenting to you, Jie Mei (originally sang by A-mei) by Lyn and I (with parts of Kenny)
There are actually like lots more lah. But i better not embarrass myself with my siaoness and horrible singing.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 11:38:00 pm
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Saturday, August 5
>
Too Fast Too Furious: Tokyo Drift with Clara and Adrian last Friday wasnt THAT awesome. The casts lost to those in Initial D (emphasizing their looks) but the cars were nicer. I love that RX8! I give it a 3.5 popcorns outta 5!
Then i caught Dragon Tiger Gate on Tuesday with Denise, Bird and Teddy. Not much of a proper story plot and the fightings were pretty graphical. But i was too obsessed with Shawn Yue the entire time i didnt bother about anything else. Quite sad actually when the shifu died. =| And that's another 3.5 popcorns outta 5.
My next movie on the list would be Click. I so wanna catch it. I heard its darn funny but turned emo towards the end. Heh!
Would be going over to my new house in a while before i meet my bestie Shalyn and Kenny bro for a ktv session.
"And so i heard he's getting attached, the guy i wanna love no longer exist."
Too Fast Too Furious: Tokyo Drift with Clara and Adrian last Friday wasnt THAT awesome. The casts lost to those in Initial D (emphasizing their looks) but the cars were nicer. I love that RX8! I give it a 3.5 popcorns outta 5!
Then i caught Dragon Tiger Gate on Tuesday with Denise, Bird and Teddy. Not much of a proper story plot and the fightings were pretty graphical. But i was too obsessed with Shawn Yue the entire time i didnt bother about anything else. Quite sad actually when the shifu died. =| And that's another 3.5 popcorns outta 5.
My next movie on the list would be Click. I so wanna catch it. I heard its darn funny but turned emo towards the end. Heh!
Would be going over to my new house in a while before i meet my bestie Shalyn and Kenny bro for a ktv session.
"And so i heard he's getting attached, the guy i wanna love no longer exist."
sealed-with-a-kiss < 2:01:00 pm
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Wednesday, August 2
> an enjoyment to life
Nothing beats better than sitting by the beach, feeling the breeze and letting the wind mess up your hair, taking away all your agonies at the same time; Facing the what seems endless sea in the night where everything is pitch dark with small lights shining miles and miles away from you; Closing your eyes and listen to slow, emo songs, humming to the music and that's what i call life.
It was a moment of peace and that's something i lack and would never feel in this bustling city.
Nothing beats better than sitting by the beach, feeling the breeze and letting the wind mess up your hair, taking away all your agonies at the same time; Facing the what seems endless sea in the night where everything is pitch dark with small lights shining miles and miles away from you; Closing your eyes and listen to slow, emo songs, humming to the music and that's what i call life.
It was a moment of peace and that's something i lack and would never feel in this bustling city.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 5:05:00 pm
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Tuesday, August 1
> imma mahjong addict
I cant believe ive been skipping lectures for the sake of satisfying my mahjong addictions. And i cant believe ive been losing money when im already suffering a deficit.
Met up with Kewei for dinner this evening after 3 years since the break up. Hmmm, what can i say? I miss the old times, but life still goes on and it would be better to look ahead than turning back heh? Was a good catching up session nonetheless.
I better stop getting hooked on to mahjong and start revising for the majors. And maybe, i should start trying my best to quit smoking. Mom has been nagging incessantly everyday and its pretty irritating to hear the same thing all the time.
Time to get myself ready for lalaland.
I cant believe ive been skipping lectures for the sake of satisfying my mahjong addictions. And i cant believe ive been losing money when im already suffering a deficit.
Met up with Kewei for dinner this evening after 3 years since the break up. Hmmm, what can i say? I miss the old times, but life still goes on and it would be better to look ahead than turning back heh? Was a good catching up session nonetheless.
I better stop getting hooked on to mahjong and start revising for the majors. And maybe, i should start trying my best to quit smoking. Mom has been nagging incessantly everyday and its pretty irritating to hear the same thing all the time.
Time to get myself ready for lalaland.
sealed-with-a-kiss < 12:38:00 am
___________________________________________
* yours truly.
amber.ruoxuan\\twenty\
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